Tags

, , ,

Perhaps one day I will no longer
Be plagued with thoughts of you.
No hope will linger when your image
Flashes across the theater of my mind.
No “someday.”
No “what if.”

Perhaps one day I will no longer
Be disoriented by the sight of you.
My nerves and all my senses won’t fuse into chaos,
My words won’t get caught in my throat,
Body temperature wont rise,
Nor will my eyes follow you longingly
Like a lost lover searching for a home.

Perhaps one day my nerves won’t signal red alert,
My pulse won’t quicken
And my palms get sweaty
Whenever I see a frame that resembles yours.
The shape of your forehead,
The muscular outline of your shoulders,
Your smile.

Maybe then the feverish waves of disappointment
Won’t wash over me like it does every time I realize
It’s just some random stranger.
It’s never you, probably, never will be.
Maybe one day this will all be a memory
And on that day I will laugh
At this foolish, obsessive, teenagerish infatuation.

But today is not that day.
Today,
I’m still a hopeless fool.